MyStErI0usAuRa (ch3rryb1oos0m) wrote in babymamadrama,

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I've got something to write about, but I'm afraid someone I know, none of you all, will see it. It isn't really a specific person, but it is about something that two of them might spot. Well, basically I've been wondering about why I seem scared. I'm like scared to make new friends. I mean, I act normal enough, but I know I am scared. It's like I don't want to be close. I think it might have to do with the fact that I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm afraid of telling me feelings, only to know that people will push me away. Yes I do tell my friends, that I have known for a while, my feelings, but never all of it. There is a whole lot that people don't know about me. I hide more than I tell, because I found out through the hard way that if your tell your feelings, you will get hurt. Of course, I tell expose more than I want to, but I can never truely know my own feelings. Sometimes I don't know why something is bothering me. It's sad. I so want to 100% trust people or at least someone, but something stops me. It's like with some people, a mean wall sorta goes up. It isn't really mean, at least most people would think so, but I consider that it is because it prevents people to get close, even if they wanted to. I'm just at a lost, and I'm sorta scared. Umm....
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